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sff_corgi_ljI probably didn't get around to mentioning it, but my mother's psychotic bulldog, Chesty, had a bad couple of weeks; when he finally got to the vet, he came home with heart medicine and a couple of other things. It's actually been working really well for him, even if he still has some effort in breathing. But he's back to being selfish, perpetually hungry and almost as annoying as he was before.
Being old (still uncurable), though, he's not really able to hog Ma's bed at night the way he used to. A friend of hers bought her a nice, solid dog ramp, but the footprint it took up just would not work in Ma's bedroom -- aside from the fact that Chesty hated it.
We needed stairs.
One of my sort-of-friends at work has a piece of Horse Country down in the Redlands and has mentioned various construction projects before. Henry could help me! He knows how to do things with wood! I came up with a design that would be sectional, for portability; hollow, for possible storage and lightness; but would also lock securely together to prevent slippage.
Unfortunately, although he was willing to knock it together, the timing was bad -- he's looking for a house in North Florida and being ill with the flu at the same time, and regretfully said he couldn't even start the project. I decided to Google about to see what sort of options there might be in commercially available dog steps... when suddenly, I ran across this. Their steps were based on this original design here.
What, foamboard sturdy enough to support heavy dogs?? Their nails don't go through it? Their feet don't go through it? From the photographic evidence, it appeared not.
I had a solution! Foam I know I can work with. I thought I had enough credit on my Visa by now and started making a mental list for Home Depot.
Other than the foam panels, I'd need a light saw. Cutting foam (styro or rubber) is a lot like cutting bread, except instead of cells of starch and protein you've got cells of puffy plastic. Unless you want squished bread, you use a serrated knife. An X-acto would also have done the job on the foam, but with thick panels, it would take a lot more effort.
Glue - let's go with the Liquid Nails. Craft glue might work, but we know from Lisa that the Liquid Nails definitely does. And... something for traction. No Astroturf, gah. But definitely something from Flooring, something which would bend cooperatively at the stair risers. We'll have to see what they've got.
The worrisome part was getting in and out of the Home Depot quickly -- it was a West Wing night! I thought it wouldn't be a problem.
Wrong.
Short form:
Unfortunately, with the waiting and the rippling and the looking for rugs, it was almost 9 PM by the time I left, never mind when I got home. I snarked at a woman who might have been a manager-type about the guys getting unhelpful this close to closing, and she and the cashier (who was a Big Guy and didn't take it personally) were both apologetic and helpful. Apparently, they would have helped me downsize the boards for fitting in the car.
You might notice what I bought in terms of panels isn't like what's in the websites. They didn't HAVE the smaller ones; they also didn't have a 1-inch size, nor a 2-inch size with the lamination on it. Improvise, improvise, improvise. Doing some hasty maths, I figured I might make do with steps that were three layers of 2-inch panel covered with the nice finish of the more expensive ¾ material. Considering how sloppy the edges were from the hasty cutwork in the store, I was going to have to otherwise swallow my æsthetics.
It went together surprisingly quickly. By the time 'Good Eats' started their appropriately-timed episode on leeks, I was set up -- dropcloth on the living room floor, first three panels on hand... oh, the Liquid Nails. Erm. WHY DIDN'T SOMEBODY SAY 'CAULKING GUN'?!? I hacksawed off most of the tip, pierced the seal, and started squeezing the stiff cardboard tube as hard as I could, spreading the glue against recommendations with my bare hand. Hey, I manicure with straight bleach, I'm tough.
Eventually, the tube got folded in half to squeeze more efficiently, but it was running out fast. Drat. I hacksawed at the side of the now-squishy and glue-covered packaging, but resorted to pliers to finally pull the cardboard open enough to scoop out glue with my fingers. The whole thing barely lasted through the first step -- 48" x 24", and almost 7 inches deep.
Steps 2 and 3 required sawing. At least now I could adjust the mini-hacksaw to have a longer reach of blade and saw more carefully, creating smoother edges. I measured the wrong lengths, though, having completely forgotten my in-head calculations of earlier, and made the second step 36 inches instead of 32, which would be ⅔s of the bottom step. The top step became 18 inches; nice broad treads, if a bit irregular. I now have much styro-scrap.
I ran out of Liquid Nails after trying to glue the bottom layer of Step 2 to Step 1. What would work, hmmm. Well... let's try the craft glue.
Stop laughing, it may have dried. Hey, it was all I had after 'Iron Chef America' (Battle Squash) started and I wasn't gonna go out to Wal*Mart. It's THE EVIL, after all (yes it IS, Debbie!).
Finally, all the layers were stacked and it was time to try on the rugs. My usual talent for volume worked much better for this than for glue -- the two little rugs covered from floor to back edge of Step 3 with only about three-four inches of overlap, and got pinned in place with 1¼" nails pushed into the foam *krisp*krisp*krisp*. Moving it was rather hilarious, because the craft glue hadn't even started to set up. Slither, slither. I finally managed to clamp onto it and lug it into my mother's bedroom, shedding 'snow' most of the way - bulky, awkward, but not at all heavy. I straightened it after setting it down and hoped it'd behave itself. Then I got to vacuum. X-(
Chesty's tried it out once, but plummeted off the bed instead of walking down because he's Chesty; Aeron, the stealth schnauzer of fear (her fear, not anybody else's), has been introduced to it and reacted much better than when she was introduced to a dog flap ('NOOOOO, IT'LL EAT ME!' -- Aeron P. Schnauzer, 2000). D'Argo's just become unnaturally excited over the whole thing, but he's a boxer. He can jump up and down off that bed without even breathing hard, so he thinks it's a toy of some sort, apparently.
And the corgi... we'll see.
Random observations:
Being old (still uncurable), though, he's not really able to hog Ma's bed at night the way he used to. A friend of hers bought her a nice, solid dog ramp, but the footprint it took up just would not work in Ma's bedroom -- aside from the fact that Chesty hated it.
We needed stairs.
One of my sort-of-friends at work has a piece of Horse Country down in the Redlands and has mentioned various construction projects before. Henry could help me! He knows how to do things with wood! I came up with a design that would be sectional, for portability; hollow, for possible storage and lightness; but would also lock securely together to prevent slippage.
Unfortunately, although he was willing to knock it together, the timing was bad -- he's looking for a house in North Florida and being ill with the flu at the same time, and regretfully said he couldn't even start the project. I decided to Google about to see what sort of options there might be in commercially available dog steps... when suddenly, I ran across this. Their steps were based on this original design here.
What, foamboard sturdy enough to support heavy dogs?? Their nails don't go through it? Their feet don't go through it? From the photographic evidence, it appeared not.
I had a solution! Foam I know I can work with. I thought I had enough credit on my Visa by now and started making a mental list for Home Depot.
Other than the foam panels, I'd need a light saw. Cutting foam (styro or rubber) is a lot like cutting bread, except instead of cells of starch and protein you've got cells of puffy plastic. Unless you want squished bread, you use a serrated knife. An X-acto would also have done the job on the foam, but with thick panels, it would take a lot more effort.
Glue - let's go with the Liquid Nails. Craft glue might work, but we know from Lisa that the Liquid Nails definitely does. And... something for traction. No Astroturf, gah. But definitely something from Flooring, something which would bend cooperatively at the stair risers. We'll have to see what they've got.
The worrisome part was getting in and out of the Home Depot quickly -- it was a West Wing night! I thought it wouldn't be a problem.
Wrong.
Short form:
The Saw Guy was paged 4-5 times, took him 20 minutes to walk over from where he was apparently discussing some flooring issue with another employee over the store's catalog (nice customer service, that). Then he told me 'We don't cut that', meaning my foam, and gave me no further assistance. I pulled out the hacksaw I was purchasing and ended up ripping the boards myself -- they wouldn't fit in Ein-y-Gwyn otherwise.So anyway, I made do all by my widdle self. I purchased:
The Paint Guy got me my adhesive quickly enough, but didn't bother to ask if I needed a caulking gun with which to apply it. I also ran short, but that wasn't his fault.
The Flooring Guy didn't even bother to acknowledge my existence. He was on a mobile phone and talking with someone who, like with the Saw Guy, I suspected was another employee in mufti.
| 2 ea. | 2-foot x 4-foot x 2-inch plain Styrofoam-type foam panels |
| 1 ea. | 2-foot x 4-foot x ¾-inch coated foam panels |
| 1 ea. | Liquid Nails for Foamboard |
| 1 ea. | Stanley hacksaw with bonus 'mini-hacksaw' |
| 3 ea. | cotton dhurrie rugs, only $2 each! |
Unfortunately, with the waiting and the rippling and the looking for rugs, it was almost 9 PM by the time I left, never mind when I got home. I snarked at a woman who might have been a manager-type about the guys getting unhelpful this close to closing, and she and the cashier (who was a Big Guy and didn't take it personally) were both apologetic and helpful. Apparently, they would have helped me downsize the boards for fitting in the car.
You might notice what I bought in terms of panels isn't like what's in the websites. They didn't HAVE the smaller ones; they also didn't have a 1-inch size, nor a 2-inch size with the lamination on it. Improvise, improvise, improvise. Doing some hasty maths, I figured I might make do with steps that were three layers of 2-inch panel covered with the nice finish of the more expensive ¾ material. Considering how sloppy the edges were from the hasty cutwork in the store, I was going to have to otherwise swallow my æsthetics.
It went together surprisingly quickly. By the time 'Good Eats' started their appropriately-timed episode on leeks, I was set up -- dropcloth on the living room floor, first three panels on hand... oh, the Liquid Nails. Erm. WHY DIDN'T SOMEBODY SAY 'CAULKING GUN'?!? I hacksawed off most of the tip, pierced the seal, and started squeezing the stiff cardboard tube as hard as I could, spreading the glue against recommendations with my bare hand. Hey, I manicure with straight bleach, I'm tough.
Eventually, the tube got folded in half to squeeze more efficiently, but it was running out fast. Drat. I hacksawed at the side of the now-squishy and glue-covered packaging, but resorted to pliers to finally pull the cardboard open enough to scoop out glue with my fingers. The whole thing barely lasted through the first step -- 48" x 24", and almost 7 inches deep.
Steps 2 and 3 required sawing. At least now I could adjust the mini-hacksaw to have a longer reach of blade and saw more carefully, creating smoother edges. I measured the wrong lengths, though, having completely forgotten my in-head calculations of earlier, and made the second step 36 inches instead of 32, which would be ⅔s of the bottom step. The top step became 18 inches; nice broad treads, if a bit irregular. I now have much styro-scrap.
I ran out of Liquid Nails after trying to glue the bottom layer of Step 2 to Step 1. What would work, hmmm. Well... let's try the craft glue.
Stop laughing, it may have dried. Hey, it was all I had after 'Iron Chef America' (Battle Squash) started and I wasn't gonna go out to Wal*Mart. It's THE EVIL, after all (yes it IS, Debbie!).
Finally, all the layers were stacked and it was time to try on the rugs. My usual talent for volume worked much better for this than for glue -- the two little rugs covered from floor to back edge of Step 3 with only about three-four inches of overlap, and got pinned in place with 1¼" nails pushed into the foam *krisp*krisp*krisp*. Moving it was rather hilarious, because the craft glue hadn't even started to set up. Slither, slither. I finally managed to clamp onto it and lug it into my mother's bedroom, shedding 'snow' most of the way - bulky, awkward, but not at all heavy. I straightened it after setting it down and hoped it'd behave itself. Then I got to vacuum. X-(
Chesty's tried it out once, but plummeted off the bed instead of walking down because he's Chesty; Aeron, the stealth schnauzer of fear (her fear, not anybody else's), has been introduced to it and reacted much better than when she was introduced to a dog flap ('NOOOOO, IT'LL EAT ME!' -- Aeron P. Schnauzer, 2000). D'Argo's just become unnaturally excited over the whole thing, but he's a boxer. He can jump up and down off that bed without even breathing hard, so he thinks it's a toy of some sort, apparently.
And the corgi... we'll see.
Random observations:
- The women's room smells like melon (I don't like melon). At least it's better than what
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crevette gets. - I have carrot hiccups. Alas, they are merely orange carrots.
- My mother seems to have the hope or belief that my state of overdraftness cures itself before paycheques.
- Spinach burritos make for a decent lunch.
- It's raining. Should cool things off for the Scottish Festival.
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no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 05:29 am (UTC)If I ever get another weiner-dog, I'll be sure to make one of those!
no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 05:45 am (UTC)Oh, I should have said - the whole shebang cost around $60, but that's 'cause I got the saw, too.
no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 06:41 am (UTC)Cool stairs!
no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 07:24 am (UTC)Maybe if it had been applied properly... but I think I still would have run short.
Hmmm... will see if I can take a picture of my hastework. :)
Oh... whups.
Date: 2005-03-04 07:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 12:44 pm (UTC):-)
*hee!*
Date: 2005-03-05 04:32 am (UTC)Well... yeah... buuuuuuut...!
no subject
Date: 2005-03-04 10:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-05 04:36 am (UTC)